Genesis 49:1-15
Jacob calls all his sons together for his final words in Genesis 49, and, boy is he ever candid with them. He tells his sons to listen to him and then he informs each one individually what they can expect going forward. Jacob's approach is straightforward and his words are very telling when it comes to each son's character. As hard as it may have been, Jacob didn't pull any punches. He told/revealed the ugly and undesirable things right along with the good characteristics.
This got me thinking about how we have a tendency to not see, maybe overlook, or simply have an inaccurate perception of what we're like and how we operate. So even though it may be hard to hear, it's good to have someone like a spouse, a parent, a friend, or even a child speak candidly with us...in love.
So how can we make sure we're listening and open to what others tell us about ourselves? How might you go about telling someone something difficult...in love? Tami W.
I think it is hard to give people truth when they are not asking for it. Sometimes it must be done however, for the persons own good. It would be much better to learn to seek advice and give permission for people to speak truth to us. However, when I have to bring up a tough situation to someone I always ask them if they are open to hearing some of the observations I have been making, and ask them if I am seeing it correctly. This, of course, clarifies if I am missing something, which is altogether possible, but opens the door to communication.
I think we should ask the Lord to bring anything undesirable in our character to light. Ask Him to reveal the truth about ourselves to us. I don't believe a human being whether a spouse or good friend, can be trusted in such an important thing, after all its how we grow as children of God, its how we mature, so ask for God's help.
Curt, thanks for the insights about asking if a person is open for hearing some observations. I tend to forget and just begin blurting instead. On the other hand, I find it easier to ask others for observations about me and then try to digest what they share, which is awkward for both types of situations, and VERY human.
This could be very hurtful if not done in love. You should go to the Lord first, then he will bring it to light. I think this is very private. I agree with Unicorn.
I can relate to this.
My spouse and I are having a hard time hearing and listening to one another right now.
We both are not able to hear what needs to be heard in order for change and growth to happen.
So I agree with Unicorn and Curt.
I love what you Curt had said about asking the other person if they are ready to hear what you have to say. With what Unicorn had to say, there are times when there is a very rough spot in a relationship, and it takes God and His timing to get through to the other person. It may even take someone else to share the truth with that person.
I hope that made sense.