July 4th

| | Comments (8)

Ephesians 5:22-6:9

Submission--that dreaded word. Is it really that bad? Well here we are in that controversial passage (Ephesians 5:22-33) that a lot of us would prefer to just skip over. That's pretty much how I used to feel about it anyway. Funny thing, though, I've had a change of heart. Let me explain.

In the past I had a tendency to come at these verses with an attitude of entitlement. You know what I mean, approaching it like "I'm the boss of me, thank you." Because of that, I really fixated on verses 22-24 and never really bothered with the instructions for husbands. But I've come to realize that I need to read verses 22-24 with verses 25-33 to get the complete picture and message. My conclusion? This isn't a passage that devalues women or commands them to be doormats. Really, it's a picture of the incredible oneness of marriage. When I come at it with this mindset, it's quite freeing. It's the men that have the huge responsibility when you jump into these verses.

Alright, those are my thoughts. But I'm interested in yours. Now's your chance to ask, discuss, or whatever on this challenging scripture. Blog away!! Tami W.

P.S. I'm not just talking to women. Let's hear from some men too.
Bookmark and Share


I am a bit older than you. I can remember when it was quite the norm for Mothers to stay at home and take care of the children and Fathers to go to off to work every day. On Sunday people would not work and most would go to Church. Satan did not like this picture. He had a plan and used the pattern shown in Romans 1 to subvert a mostly God Fearing Nation and turn it into what is increasingly a God Hating or, at least, a God Ignoring Nation.
"Feminism" was one of his most insidious tools. As "The Prince of the Power of the Air", he used his wiles on the Intelligentsia who bought his "Progressive" line and became his avid disciples. They began to promote the idea that Men had "subjugated" Women and that Women needed to throw off the chains of this bondage, etc. "Women's Studies" programs (nothing but bold faced indoctrination classes) were started at all the Universities. In these "classes", Girls were informed in solemn tones how base, greedy and selfish Boys are and were given techniques for gaining power over those feckless creatures.
One incident at college regarding this always sticks in my mind. (I knew something was going on...) I was heading into a class building as a Girl (whoops, I mean Woman) was converging toward the same door. As I had been taught and thought proper, I opened the door for her to enter. She then proceeded to "theatrically" and very pointedly upbraid me for doing this in front of everyone within earshot. Most people were mystified by it but I saw a number of "knowing" looks on some of the other girls faces. The look of "empowerment" ("Yea, hath God said..."). To me, it was just rudeness but then what did a Mere Man know anyway. Soon media picked up the ball and promoted the idea that Dad is a Dork in countless lame "situation comedies".
From those meager beginnings in the 60's and 70's Satan's minions have "progressed us" to the point that now America has at least 50% of all births out of wedlock and a huge underclass of "single parent households" who have "submitted" to Government rather than Husband.
I do not believe it is hopeless, though, and your comments regarding your expanding understanding of the meaning of the verses above are part of that hope. I have seen that recognition among more Young Men and Women of late.
Satan's end game is not Feminism or Socialism or any of the "isms". He just wants to take people to Hell with him. Those political movements are just his tools.
I have a line I like to use that sometimes needs some explaining.
"The best politics are the politics of Jesus."
Followers of Jesus become members of a Party that far transcends mere human politics. It has the power to transform people for good in the "here and now" as well as to usher them on to the "hereafter". The Politics of Jesus guided our Founding Fathers in the Birth of this Nation. So, on this 4th of July, let us harken back to their fearlessness in promoting the Gospel and call all Americans and people everywhere to the Saving Grace of Jesus our Lord and Savior.
Submission to Him is our personal and corporate Salvation.
Keep up the Good Work!

My first day at this - I keep trying different ways to get in daily Scripture.

I see submission as something I need to do totally to Jesus. He is my husband, I have no other and so when I read these verses I see the parts about the church and Christ and tend to gloss over all the rest. I've really avoided these and all the "marriage" verses in the Bible over the years, thinking they only apply to the married, and they've only made me a sad reminder that I have the gift of singleness and not marriage from God.

These verses also make me sad as we have a generational history of divorce and abandonment in my family. My generation and those before me were not raised with this biblical model to turn to, and I see so clearly how things have played out without God's Word to show us the way.

Verse 6:2 is a special reminder to me today, as I often do not honor my parents, I complain and grumble about them more often than not. Today would have been their 56th wedding anniversary if their marriage had survived. July 4th is always a sad reminder to me and not a fun holiday weekend. It's hard not to blame them for the challenges and problem that my siblings and I have faced in our lives. I have forgiven them, God made it so much easier for me once He forgave me all my sins. But, I still grumble about them and that I see today is not honoring at all.

My husband is not a Christian, but he likes to remind me of these verses. If it weren't for one of our best friends, who is a pastor's wife, he would not even know Ephesians 5:22-24 existed. I joke with him that it doesn't apply to him since he is not a Christian :)

Thats a tough one to live by as a husband - especially when your spouse has that "boss of me" thing going on. I am finding that the only way that battle can be won is to lead by example. Humility and a humble heart will win over hearts and minds, not Me trying to crack the whip. I'm not the Holy Spirit, but he works through me to be the husband and father I need, and want, to be. Thank you Jesus.

I agree with you Tami. I believe this scripture has more to say about how we serve Christ and being Christ minded. Our submission is first to Christ. Our first service in Christ is to our husband and not as a door mat, as you said, but to live as Christ before our husband. I believe the key word is respect and service. Not all husbands are shepherd leaders, in that respect, I found it helpful for me to intertwine this scripture with 1 Peter 3:1-6. My husband was not a true follower of Christ when we first married at the young age of 18. Later in our marriage he did become a follower and the fruit became visible. I had to train myself in the admonition of the Holy Spirit to get on the same page with Christ adopting the guidelines of what 1 Peter 3:1-6 meant for my life with my husband. In doing so, my life became an open Bible for Steve. I fell many times, almost daily, but with it being taken to the Lord, God did the work in Steve's heart and his heart was melted before the Lord through the work of Christ in his life. I found that it was not that I was submitting to my husband as much as it was that I was submitting to Christ, having the mind of Christ. When I got to that point, I found it was then that I was removing my hands from the task and placing my husband in the hands of God, then I began to see the change in him after the change had taken place in me.

Wow, this whole 5th chapter is very simple in it's message, but difficult to live out. This summarizes the reason we were all created. We are to live-out the purpose Christ had when he came. He humbled himself, even when he had all authority, (Matt 28:18), to the purpose and will of the Father. It was a simple and straightforward purpose, but difficult for Christ to complete in a human sense. When taken in context, we are all to submit to God's will and then to the need of others to grow closer to Him. I should be willing to do the hard stuff (submitting) in order that others who already know Him will grow closer, as well as the ones who don't, so they, especially a spouse, may find him (1Cor 5:16).

Why can't this simply mean what it says? Wives, submit to your husbands- regardless of whether he is worthy of it or not. Husbands love your wives the way Christ loves the church- giving Himself in totality. Even willing to die, even dying for His bride's well being. Yes men, this means you hobbies, etc. if that is what loving your wife requires.

Whether your husband or spouse is a believer or not, or obedient to the faith or not is of no matter.

In its' context, as ch 6 continues with family matters, the passage is written for/to married persons. Chapters and verses can really mess up the flow of the letters.

as the wives submit herself to her husband, can we also submit ourself to Christ in the same way in order to live for him. I am trying to get on track with living for Christ, not my way but in the way that he want me to live for him,

Leave a Comment

About Me

Hi, my name is Tami Weissert, the P4 facilitator and the "voice" behind the blogs. I'm passionate about helping people grow spiritually and actively encourage Bible engagement through conference speaking and writing. I also served as co-host of the Back to the Bible radio program for over 8 years. A little about me. I'm married to Jeff, and we love scuba diving, playing with our 3 dachshunds and going to Husker football games. I also love growing orchids, singing and Diet Pepsi. I hope you'll join in the conversation as we read the Bible and grow together.

About My Blog

I'm passionate about engaging God's Word! And my blog is about just that--giving you opportunities to receive, reflect on and respond to Scripture. Each day you'll find a short passage as well as thoughts, challenges and application questions for you to think about and respond to. I look forward to interacting with you and learning together, so post comments as often as you'd like. You can even sign up to get the blogs delivered to your inbox each day!

Tami's New Book

Available on Amazon

Available on realwomen21.com
Facebook Twitter

Monthly Archives

About this Entry

This page contains a single entry by Tami W published on July 4, 2009 2:10 AM.

July 3rd was the previous entry in this blog.

July 5th is the next entry in this blog.

Find recent content on the main index or look in the archives to find all content.